well I don't know how to start this. so let's just jump right in. I have a severe case of senioritis. A term which here means: I absolutely can't stand being a senior. Hate it. I have no hopes or dreams for the future. Recently I have lost nearly all interest in everything. I find no excitement or satisfaction in the things I once loved. So what am I supposed to do now?! Also recently I have lost almost all of my appetite. have to force myself to eat. Sleep is fading too. I can't seem to sleep well at all lately, which is something I have never had a problem with. I think I may be dying. if so, hopefully 'Ol Mr. Reaper visits me sooner than later. I've been super depressed lately too, and I'm not entirely sure why. I feel sick. but not flu sick, more like a disgusted sick. to quote one of my favorite songs "I can't see much difference between the dark and the light". speaking of which, the entire self titled Violent femmes album seems to describe my life pretty well. For example: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BOx5ROp99Xs And I think I may also be slightly bi polar. but who knows. This is going to be a hard winter. At this point I have very little or no hope for anything and everything. I feel like a one hit wonder band from the 80's...no one cares about me any more. which I know is not true, but that's what it feels like.
I just want to find happiness.