Monday, October 18, 2010

Driving Tips

1. always drive at least 60 MPH over the speedlimit

2. Lie to all cops should you get pulled over

3.drive on the left side of the road between 9 p.m and 4 a.m.

4. close your eyes when driving around all corners

5. use your headlights only during the day

6. drive as fast as you possibly can in the snow

7. if an officer of the law attempts to pull you over, floor it!

8. if you happen to own a paintball gun, drive around and shoot every white car you see

9. when approaching a red light, jump out of the car and do a dance that involves waving your middle fingers in the air

10. only drive backwards on the freeway

but remember kids, always wear a seat belt! (and full body armor)


warning, the previous driving tips created by Mr. Morgan Knapp are all bloody stupid ideas, therefor you should never attempt any of them. If you do decide to be a moron and ignore this warning, you do so at your own risk. Mr Morgan Knapp can not be held liable for any consequences that should come of following such tips.

3 comments:

  1. I'm glad :) i wrote it cause i needed a break from homework, before i killed someone!

    ReplyDelete